Author: MRamesh

This week, I’m inspired to choose this topic after listening to Dr. Jeanette Freeman’s audio/podcast on insight timer. If you are looking for a resource to begin meditation or if you are already a meditator, Insight timer is a wonderful app to derive inspiration from thousands of meditation teachers.

I have been using Insight timer more in these last six months.

In her podcast, Dr. Freeman shares the three keys to happiness as follows:

1. Feel what you want to heal.
2. Your happiness is not dependent on everything going great.
3. Happiness is the true state of your Divine nature, your Higher Self. And, the infinite mind or the Universal Intelligence is operating through your mind.

As we begin to feel and acknowledge all that we go through in our lives- the good, bad, ugly and the worst, we are able to lay the foundation for freedom and liberation on the other side. Even though we don’t want to go through the discomfort again, it is indeed a very important step in the healing process.

When things do not go very well, we naturally feel unhappy and we sometimes push ourselves to think positively not acknowledging how we feel in that moment in order to get to a better feeling place. This takes us back to the first step of feeling before healing. This can easily lead us to the realization that is outlined in the third key that happiness is our true nature.

The third key can seem so far out there for many of us. A simple way to understand this is that our body is made of the same components as the cosmic field or the Universe. If our bodies are made of the same matter as the infinite field around us, then it becomes reasonable that the infinite mind is operating through us.

Wishing you peace and happiness!

Acceptance applies to the inner as well as the outer world. Acceptance includes the ability to tranquilly accept both personal and human limitations without loss of self esteem. – David. R. Hawkins

At the beginning of 2020, I chose “Acceptance” as my word for this year. The Universe has really brought several opportunities for me to practice acceptance. I didn’t even know why I was drawn towards acceptance. But, now I realize that my subconscious mind brought acceptance to the surface because I’m ready to fully embrace acceptance or I may have some kind of an unconscious resistance to acceptance.

If you are still reading this post, thank you for staying with me and taking the time to read. In EFT tapping, when we begin to tap at the karate chop point, saying the set up statement, we always say, “Even though I have this problem, I accept myself”. In other words, no matter how bad or miserable I may feel in this moment, I accept myself with this problem.

As much as we want to accept people, life events, and experiences, it also poses a challenge if we are forcing ourselves to accept, because it can make us feel as though we do not have power and a choice. We always have a choice, when it comes to anything and everything in life. What makes it difficult to see the choices is when we drift away from our consciousness. Well, if we are always in an enlightened, and conscious state, then we will not be having difficulties in acceptance.

Looking back at 2020, and the journey we all have been through because of Covid-19, we can definitely relate to the word acceptance. We, as a planet collectively accepted the unacceptable. We adapted to a new way of living, thinking, believing and evolving as a planet. But, did we all do it from a place of total acceptance? I certainly didn’t adapt from a place of total acceptance. If you answered “No” to this question, this will lead you to a target that you can tap on and create an opening for acceptance.

The beauty of tapping is you can meet yourself where you are at and begin tapping by giving your emotions a voice. So, instead of asking why am I not able to accept( this could be a person, a situation, an emotion, a feeling, a behavior, or an outcome), begin tapping by saying out loud one of the following statements:

I’m unable to accept

I don’t want to accept

I can’t accept

It is impossible to accept

It is too difficult to accept

The above statements are just examples. You can feel free to change it according to your needs. The idea is to give you some relief just by tapping and voicing your emotions. As you continue to do a few rounds or several rounds of tapping with these statements, notice what is happening to your body and your mind. Take a pause after every round and notice the changes. If you are getting some insights or an awareness, acknowledge, as that can lead you to the answers that you are looking for the current issue.

Until next time, keep tapping!

I haven’t written a blog post for a long time now. My friend and accountability partner who always holds the space for me encouraged me to take my time to do my homework.

During the last few months, I felt pulled towards all directions, and now that I have fulfilled some of the commitments that I made, I noticed that I continue to feel restless and unsettled. As a tapper who taps regularly, I’m always conscious of where I’m emotionally and address the emotions that surface using tapping on a daily basis.

As I continue to practice tapping in my own life, I realized that no matter how much I work on myself,  I have those days when I’m taken over by fear, terror, stress and overwhelm from time to time. During those trying and difficult moments, I do this process called “mental noting” an idea introduced by my mentor. I share the emotions that I experience with my family and friends.

Our body is our unconscious mind. When I’m emotionally hijacked I experience some difficult sensations and discomfort in my body. As I begin to soothe my nervous system through tapping and by giving my emotions and my bodily sensations a voice, I begin my journey into healing.

As simple as it may sound, sometimes even after tapping for a long time, we may not experience a relief or we feel stuck in the same place without any movement. I was also in that place a few weeks back and it has been quite a journey to get myself to a better feeling place.

If you are a parent or a caregiver to someone, and if you have been telling yourself that you have to stay strong, be brave, bold, and fearless, I encourage you to give yourself permission to acknowledge your deep fears and terrorizing thoughts through tapping.

Even after doing several rounds of tapping, I didn’t experience any shifts, my inner critic was screaming out loud ,” You got to be able to clear this; you have been doing this for a long time; you should know what you are doing; who do you think you are to be doing this work and sharing it with others; look at you, you brought this on to yourself” and it went on and on.

My inner child was the one who was in fear, and panic. The child in me wanted to cry and express how powerless, hopeless, and weak she felt in her mind, and body. The little girl in me really needed the time to process her emotions. She needed to feel safe, secure and be reassured that everything is going to be alright. Things are going to be okay soon. And, she needed to hear this from her family, friends and her mentor in different ways.

If you have been tapping on an issue and do not experience any shifts, I encourage you to be gentle, patient, and kind with yourself as you go through your healing journey. After tapping for nine years, I understand that everything that is showing up in our life and our consciousness is meant for our own healing and relief.

Scientists believe that our brains have these built- in circuits for negativity bias. According to Dr. Rick Hanson, “The brain is like a Velcro for negative experiences and Teflon for positive ones.” When you decide that tapping is not working or going to help you with an issue, it is a good idea to remember the times when you got relief using tapping. That will encourage you to continue to work on yourself, just like it encouraged me to work on myself. Transformation, change and healing is a continuous process. Sometimes, the shifts are so subtle that they can easily go unnoticed. We cannot expect the shifts to go from a 10 to a Zero, every time we tap for a few minutes.

Wishing you peace and hope in your healing journey!

“Your kids don’t need a perfect mom! They need a happy one!”

I came across this quote a few months back and I loved it. Isn’t it true that our kids are not expecting us to be perfect? It is always the moms who put so much pressure on themselves thinking that they need to be perfect all the time. When it comes to happiness, kids can immediately pick up the energy even if they don’t verbally express how their mom is feeling. Kids would do anything to make their mom feel better.

Growing up in India, we never celebrated Mother’s Day. I think it’s an honor for every mom to celebrate motherhood and womanhood once a year on this special day. A day for her to acknowledge the beauty (both inner and outer) in her. My mom passed away twelve years ago and I really wish I had told her a lot of things that I know now. First of all, I would have taught her this beautiful technique of tapping. I would have told her that she was born brilliant and that there is greatness within her and she doesn’t need any validation or approval from anyone. I would have also told her that she doesn’t have to please anyone. The only person from whom she can get validation and approval is herself. And, the only person that she has to please is herself.

This Mother’s Day, I invite you to consider putting yourself first and asking the following questions:

What do I think?

What do I feel?

What do I need?

When you answer these questions, think about giving that to yourself, rather than waiting for someone else to give it to you. If one of your answers was love, start your day by practicing self love.

“Love is the great miracle cure. Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.”– Louise Hay

Personally, for me, Mother’s Day brings up a lot of emotions, so I always turn to tapping. If you are like me, I encourage you to tap and acknowledge whatever is coming up for you.

As I get older, I realize that I was once a child before I became a mother. Every mother was once a child before she became a mother. So, nurture her, send love and kindness to the child that is within you and give her a hug and let her know that she was always awesome and the greatness in her was always shining bright.

When we practice accepting and loving ourselves, we will be teaching our kids also to practice the same. There will always be some parts of us, we may never be able to accept and then there are some parts of us that we want to acknowledge, but never take the time. Today, is a great day to get into a self- inquiry process and make a list of things that you love and acknowledge about yourself.

I’m yet to meet a mother who has not felt guilty for not doing enough for her children and family. This Mother’s day, I encourage each and every one of you to take an inventory of all the times you did the best for your children and family. Going forward, every time you feel I should have known better, I should have done better, give yourself permission to acknowledge, “ I did the best I could with all the resources that were available to me at that time.”

Cheers to all the mothers across the globe!  Let’s shine our light bright, stand in our power (Shakthi) by being the force for good, and continue to use our voice to speak our truth!

And, remember our kids do not need a perfect mom, they need a happy one!

There is a presence, a silence, a stillness which is here by itself. There is no doer of it, no creator of this stillness. It is simply here in you, with you. It is the fragrance of your own self. There is nothing to do about this, it is naturally present. This fragrance of peace, this spaciousness, it is the fragrance of your own being. – Mooji

As we complete more than six weeks of lock down, let’s all try to tune into the present moment and be with it, no matter what has happened in the past or what the future holds in store for us.

The more I tune into this moment, I understand that this moment is inevitable. I notice my own patterns of self sabotage, procrastination, lack of clarity showing up profoundly in these last few weeks. Taking 100% responsibility for everything helps us get out of blaming or shaming anyone and it puts us in a place of empowerment and autonomy. I had to constantly remind myself that I’m doing the best I can and I have always done the best I can. We all are doing the best we can with the available resources at that time.

My inner critic has been speaking out loud saying that you should be doing more, you can make better use of the time and focus on growing your business. But, there is a part of me that knows I’m already doing so much at home, as I continue to adapt to these changes during this challenging time. I acknowledge that I’m right where I need to be in this journey.

Practicing gratitude, compassion, and self forgiveness has been incredibly helpful in these past few weeks. But, forgiving others has been very difficult, as old wounds and traumas get activated and have been sending me clear signals that I’m not ready to forgive anyone. So, I sat with all those emotions and tapped on my anger, resentment, disappointments and experienced so much relief after ranting and tapping on my deep felt emotions.

Taking the time to sit with my emotions even if it was very uncomfortable, tapping with a practitioner and helping clients achieve emotional fitness has led me to understand that we all are in this together. Over the past few weeks, helping my clients address their limiting beliefs, and helping them uncover the greatness in them and letting them gain the awareness that they don’t have to be someone else or be a certain way in order to shine their light has been very fulfilling for me.

What did come up during the tapping sessions repeatedly was the shift in perspective achieved by clients in terms of gaining hope, clarity and the confidence to move forward with their decision or gain acceptance with what is going on in their lives, and being aware that the child in them is activated and running their show during these times of stress.

In EFT, we always go to the events and memories that may be contributing to the current experience, sometimes going all the way back to childhood when all of this started and work on clearing the emotions, bodily sensations, ultimately leading to the problem being totally neutralized. The more we do that, we are able to return to wholeness, and practicing presence and stillness becomes a lot easier.

If you had a childhood growing up in a dysfunctional family or with an abusive parent or caregiver, your sense of safety and security will always be compromised because your subconscious mind can still get caught up in the same old distress thinking that I have to run and save myself from danger. This can show up as trying to please everyone, afraid of being seen and heard, fear of being judged and criticized or even asking someone for help.

So, if you are trying to get quiet and your mind is running all over the place, let it run and begin to observe if there is a recurring theme and you can address it using EFTэs Basic recipe.

As we peel and remove the layers underlying the problems that we repeatedly face in our lives, we begin to be more and more present with ourselves and enjoy the stillness that is always within us.